January pg 4

Archive – January 20090 commentsI’ll take SNL alumni for 100, Alex.
Posted Jan-08-09 10:05:56 PST Updated Jan-08-09 10:54:23 PSTWhich SNL alumni is known for laughing in every.single.sketch?

The answer

Horatio Sanz

Mr. Sanz was known for cracking up during sketches to the amusement of the SNL television audience. While some folks think that it was another SNL alumni, Jimmy Fallon, we here at the 12 Dogs call the notion “madness”. Although there might be a reason for the confusion. Read more here…

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2008/11/24/snl-alum-horatio-sanz-dro_n_146143.html

Jimmy Fallon is soon to be host of NBC’s LateNight with Conan O’Brian.

LOL, Next post?

Haven’t got time for the pain.

Keep reading there are ALOT of new posts.

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3 commentsHaven’t got time for the pain.
Posted Jan-08-09 08:41:57 PST Updated Jan-08-09 10:51:03 PSTI was reading a friends blog. She’s been lucky enough to find someone that she really seems to care about. Anyway I was reading her blog. It was so different. Calm and happy.

Centered.

Later out of the blue I started to think of the changes in our lives. The two ideas combine into one memory and well there I was doing laundry and singing this song.

It’s a good song. Reminds me of my friend and the changes in her life…

Lyrics?

All those crazy nights when I cried myself to sleep
Now melodrama never makes me weep anymore
’cause I haven’t got time for the pain
I haven’t got room for the pain
I haven’t the need for the pain
Not since I’ve known you

You showed me how, how to leave myself behind
How to turn down the noise in my mind
Now I haven’t got time for the pain
I haven’t got room for the pain
I haven’t the need for the pain
Not since I’ve known you

Suffering was the only thing that made me feel I was alive
Though that’s just how much it cost to survive in this world
’til you showed me how, how to fill my heart with love
How to open up and drink in all that white love
Pouring down from the heaven
I haven’t got time for the pain
I haven’t got room for the pain
I haven’t the need for the pain
Not since I’ve known you

So– about Tryork.

Where have all the flowers gone?

(keep going cause there are even MORE new posts)

—————–

Quote of the Day

“Always be your own good friend.”

Yes, my email seems to be working fine.

Hope are having a great day.

Ann
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2 commentsWhere have all the flowers gone?
Posted Jan-08-09 06:00:18 PST Updated Jan-08-09 06:09:20 PSTWhere’s Tryork?

LOL Don’t know about ya’ll but I’m having “Tryork blog” withdrawals.

In an effort to try to cheer up?

Odd facts, Small Worlds, and 6 degrees of separation

Hope you have a great day!

Auntie Slacker

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4 commentsOdd facts, Small Worlds, and 6 degrees of separation
Posted Jan-08-09 05:24:41 PST Updated Jan-08-09 10:39:47 PST

Okay – 6 degrees of comedy separation Chris Kattan’s Mr. Peepers > Craig Ferguson’s cheeky monkeys

Game of interelatedness played in the late 90’s

First degree

Chris Kattan played that “cheeky monkey”, Mr. Peeper’s, on SNL from the middle 90’s to the early 2000’s.

Second degree

The last time he played Mr. Peeper’s as a permanent cast member was on Weekend Update then hosted by Tina Fey and Jimmy Fallon.

Third degree

Jimmy Fallon who was, along with Tina Fey, the co host of SNL’s weekend update, is set to become Conan O’Bryan’s replacement on NBC’s late night show, Late Night.

Fouth degree

Conan O’Bryan’s show, Late Night with Conan O’Bryan competes with another late night talk show host, Craig Ferguson.

Fifth degree

Craig Ferguson does a comedy routine where he calls his audience “cheeky monkey’s” another is playing “sexually ambiguous” characters on his show.

Sixth degree of comedy separation

Which brings us back to that “cheeky monkey” Mr. Peepers played by Chris Kattan who not only played that “cheeky monkey”, Mr. Peeper’s on SNL, but also played the “sexually ambiguous” exotic dancer, Mango, on SNL.

Small world.

Okay–

Lemmie try something different and kind of on the same topic.

What is the definition of the word “cougar”.

I’m asking because of something ironic I heard on TLLS with Tv’s CF.

In the monologue Monday night where he announced his engagement he said that there would be some dissappointed “cougars”. Mr. Ferguson, as you know, got married over the Christmas break to someone who reported to be 20 years younger than he is. Now when I heard him use the word “cougar” I did a mental double take. I thought that “a cougar” was a woman in her 40’s (like Mr. Ferguson) who dated much younger men in their 20’s (kind of like the new Mrs. Ferguson). This got me to wondering.

Is there a male equivalent for “a cougar”?

So I went looking and found this definition.

A “cougar” is a fur bearing mammal capable of consuming large quantities of meat without choking on the bone.

Next up?

Starshine
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2 commentsStarshine
Posted Jan-07-09 12:15:50 PST Updated Jan-08-09 10:57:37 PSTI watch his eyes and waited for a miracle. Every Christmas for the last 10 years. I would watch for something. Some flicker of hope. A miracle just for me. Handmaiden to other’s miracles all these years. Every year the same. Like Babee, I smile up into the sky. Babee does that. He’s luckier than I am. No one’s taught him his place in the universe. He doesn’t understand the concept of the words “you don’t deserve”. He doesn’t know that humans look at him and say, ” How ugly”. Babee doesn’t know. From his eyes shine happy and love and the pride of being joyous.

I saw this girl once who’d been on the street for months.

You’d never know that she’d ever been young. Her eyes so dark that there wasn’t any life left in them. Between the heroin and the alcohol and what a psychiatist friend called “disassociative” something or other she’d left “the building” along time ago. She didn’t fight back. Didn’t try. Kind of like a jukebox. P:ut 50 bucks or some heroin in and she’d play you a song. But inside her heart, she wasn’t there. I wondered at the people around her. Maybe I could begin to understand why her “john” was there (even if that was difficult). I would have thought that he was loosing money. Cost more to put the drugs in than what money he made. But it was the guys who’d go there who were the real mystery. You’d think that they’d have been scared stiff with the AIDS and syphillis. A blow up doll would be safer. But still they’d cruise by, take a “trip around the world “, and then go off to spread the gift of cheerey diseases to their wife or girlfriends.

I love my dogs because—.

There is still a light in my dog’s eyes. They don’t know to be offended or saddened by life. Like little kids they romp and play. If one of my dogs is sad? It’s because they didn’t have lap time or a good run. It’s not been easy but soon it will be better. A good run without worry about cars or people who don’t like them. Just a warm bed, a place to play, lap time and a place to run. A little bit longer but not too much. They’ll have their Christmas.

A good one it will be.

When I look up into the sky I see the same stars as my dogs and that young girl. For all of us I ask for the same thing. Peace on Earth and a “home”.

Next
A prayer

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7 commentsI say a prayer
Posted Jan-07-09 04:39:45 PST Updated Jan-07-09 04:51:44 PSTNews on the television tells a tale of war.

I don’t care who you are or which side you are on, surely you will agree that the kids, who are experiencing all the violent acts brought by the adults in the Middle East, are in a mess.

It’s for children I pray.

I pray that they will some how find peace instead of growing up angry and full of hate. I pray that their children will know not just peace but also kindness and happiness again.

I hope that all our children and our children’s children should know peace, love, kindness, and happiness.

I pray for kind peace.

All Through The Night

There are alot of different lyrics set to this melody. I like the following lyrics the best. It’s based on the Welsh lullaby All Through The Night

Sleep my love, and peace attend thee
All through the night;
Guardian angels God will lend thee,
All through the night,
Soft the drowsy hours are creeping,
Hill and vale in slumber steeping,
I my loving vigil keeping,
All through the night.

2. Angels watching ever round thee,
All through the night,
In thy slumbers close surround thee,
All through the night,
They should of all fears disarm thee,
No forebodings should alarm thee,
They will let no peril harm thee,
All through the night.

Next interactive story under construction here > All Through The Night
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2 commentsAll Through The Night
Posted Jan-07-09 04:00:19 PSTShe’d been up and down all night. Couldn’t sleep.

No matter how hard she tried she couldn’t sleep. It was like that sometimes. When she missed the water. Homesick. She could distract herself most times by imagining a story or singing a song but tonight for some unknow reason nothing was working. So she wrote it down. Her grandmother taught her to do that. When she couldn’t sleep she could count her blessings. When she was older she could write them down. The act of it reassured her that no matter what was happening wrong in her life there was good in it too. As she got older she found that she could write to sort out how she felt about the world. The list of pros and cons. Written prayers to God for help or thanks. Putting the feelings down made them real somehow. Concrete.

But tonight was different. Tonight she did’t want to see those ideas concrete. She was worried about her friends. Maternal she guessed. She thought of them like her own daughter so she worried about them too. This feeling worried her. She just wanted it to evaporate not write it down. Maybe if she were to write it nicely. To put a positive spin or a funny side to what she saw that would make it better. That’s how she found out that it wasn’t just her friend she was writing about. Some how her friend and she were linked in away that she didn’t realize.

This is what she wrote.

Say what you mean and mean what you say

Then she wrote something else. The other part of her.

Fate I’m growing older and frankly tired of being alone. You took the person from me who made my heart sing. Then you told me no problem start over. Then start over. Then start over. I’ve tried to think what I did to piss you off . So defect in my heart that makes you think I should walk alone. I will continue to tell you the same thing. No. You Fate were wrong then and wrong now. All you do is make me cry and I will not. Okay. So keep it up and I’ll keep telling you you’re wrong and all you’ll get from me is the same thing.

You, Fate, are wrong.

Listen to the song and tell me this current situation is good for me.

LOL I just survive my life Fate. Can you imagine if I actually had a traveling companion?

This is not nor will I ever allow this to be my home.

This is my parent’s home. Not mine.

My home is on the water.

On the Gulf of Mexico.

I will not ever let my heart have roots in any other place.

Surely you understand that now.

She reread the last sentence and then stopped.

to be continued and I’m going to remind you that is 12 dogs and a blog. Fact and fiction people, before you assume. Ask.

——————

For the last storywave

click >Okay so

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0 commentsSay what you mean and mean what you say
Posted Jan-07-09 03:38:40 PSTSo–

I think too much of the institution of marriage to take it lightly.

I just can’t see the happy here.

But my mom raised me to be polite. She told me that in certain situations if you can’t say something nice it was just best not to say anything.

So that’s what I’ve decided to do.

With one exception. It’s not the age difference that is so bothersome. It’s the fact that the groom has been so unhappy over the last year. If you’re in love with someone enough to marry them then you’re happy about it. It comes from within. All the rest is just details. True you will be unhappy some days but still… This comes from someone who’s grown up around tested 50 and 60 year marriages. And someone who’s been in love. I’ve been in a relationship over a long period of time with someone who I was truly in love with and someone that I wasn’t. I was unhappy in both relationships. It was only the unhappy one that made me gray before my time. What I see is what we call here ” a brokered bussiness agreement made with the practical”. Love isn’t always practical. Sometimes it’s just what you do.

I wish that I could say different. Or I wish that I could say I was being jeolous and selfish. Now? I’m just saying what I mean and meaning what I say.

Nolen, this will probably sound abit weird to you if you are reading. That’s because it’s to a particular person with a particular set of circumstances. I happen to like this person. I want them to marry well. That’s why it is so sad.

I know that there are folks who want to call this fate. I can’t.

The song is for my folks and grandparents. Both married well over 50 years.

They’re how I measure marriage. They live and lived this song every day of their life together.

That’s marriage.

There. I said what I mean and I mean what I say.

Now then the next post?

Just a note for another friend

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3 commentsJust a note for a friend
Posted Jan-06-09 10:16:04 PST Updated Jan-06-09 16:19:38 PSTOkay so

this is a serious, very serious, note for a friend.

I have a cold and I’m dripping out of my nose. My head is swimming and for the last couple of days, I’ve been a walking before picture of a NyQuil commercial. I’ve gotten no sleep. I’m crankier than anyone should be.

The cure.

I’m going to pull weeds now. It’s stopped raining and the sky is blue. Me and the dogs are gonna go out there in that field. They’re going to run and I’m going do stuff of a positive nature. So I’ll have something to show for my time of being pissy.

Thank you ever so much for your very swift kick to the rear.

You’re a good friend. Now before I say anymore to pizz you off I’m going to tell the rest of ya to have a good day. And I’m going to hug my friend who is a real sweetheart.

Then I’m going to remind you all that 12 dogs is my writing journal. Fact and fiction are here. But between you and me, I highly recommend the bug zapper video . When you put it with the notion of the Wedding March played backwards and the idea of people getting married. Well it’s durn entertaining.

The rest of it is just me being honest–or pissy–kind of depends on your point of view…

Now since I don’t drink Tequilla, I’m gonna go (really) pull those weeds or move limbs or run with the pups or something…

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0 commentsOkay so
Posted Jan-06-09 09:20:07 PST Updated Jan-06-09 09:29:20 PST…there’s a contest of sorts, a kind of an interactive story, AND on the next post you can actually hear what the Wedding March sounds like when played backwards.

This is 12 dogs…fact and fiction. yada, yada, yada

(Now me, my dogs, and my convertable car gotta go find a stretch of beach to stretch on. My son has told me that I’m not particularly charitable today. Of course I also told him to turn off the computer and go find a tree to climb. Out of doors activity is good for a kid. Cya tomorrow, Gentle Reader, if not the next day for sure. Ya know. Hugs, Auntie)

Love that David Allen Coe song…

You don’t have to call me “darlin”… darlin… Cause uh darlin…

That’s not my name…

True story. Kind of except for the part I’m going to make up. There was this guy who went out with so many women that he started calling all women “darlin” . He said it did two things right quick. One, he knew that they were probably easy to please. AND two he NEVER had to worry about calling a woman by the wrong name EVER again. Oh and there was also a third thing. Something about any woman who’d let him call them darlin being kinda cheap and real easy…That and how any word could be a “four letter word” if it was said the right way. Even ” l – o – v – e ”

Well I didn’t say it was a good story or an entirely true story.

But there was this guy…

Hey look the sun is shining and the sky is blue.

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2 commentsThis is 12 dogs…fact and fiction. yada, yada, yada
Posted Jan-06-09 08:34:41 PST Updated Jan-06-09 08:55:31 PSTSurely you know by now Gentle Reader.

Note here that this is 12 dogs, a writer’s journal, fact and fiction reside here. Ask first before you assume…

By the way, this is what we heard when they played the Wedding March backwards.

Tee Hee.

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1 commentHello
Posted Jan-06-09 08:28:37 PST Updated Jan-06-09 08:36:52 PSTCongrats Gentle Reader. By accident or temperment you’ve found this. I’m thinking of having a bit of a contest. The Gentle Reader who can find the most of these first will win a chance to actually see what the real Author Ann looks like next June.

Well you’ll get to see a photo.

Wait — you didn’t think that there would be an actual face to face or maybe money did you?

Oh honey…

So comment here and keep looking. No rhyme or reason to it and I can change my mind.

Best regards.

Now back to programing.

This is 12 dogs…fact and fiction. yada…

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2 commentsHi ya Gentle Reader. Fancy meeting you here.
Posted Jan-06-09 07:12:59 PST Updated Jan-06-09 07:23:18 PSTIt’s time for a story!!!

Hurray!!!!

In honor of Valentine’s Day

Dreamtime

Or

You could skip the story and I dunno. Let’s try Marriages for one thousand,

Or

You could watch DJ Derrick Johnson go turkey bowling with President (then Govenator) George W Bush.

Cue Barbra …”Meeeeemooorrriieeessss…..”

Those were the days.

What ever you do Gentle Reader. Remember to always have fun. Look on the sunny side. Remember that life is just one long series of rainbows and unicorns.

Hugs and Kisses.

Auntie Slacker

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0 commentsDreamtime
Posted Jan-06-09 06:55:25 PST Updated Jan-09-09 08:02:03 PSTShe might have kissed him back had he not made her so mad.

So she did the move that irony of irony Mathew had taught her to keep her safe.

She kneed him.

Hard.

He couldn’t walk for weeks it hurt so bad.

And well the resulting inflamation decreased his sperm count so that babies were definately out of the picture. At least that was the tale he told the next female he tried to –well– she believed him and now? She’s having triplets. Gonna be big as a house and madder than all get out in Labor and Delivery.

And Maria?

Well, she never ever ever got screwed over by another ass as long as she lived.

The End

Boy I love being a writer.

cue the music boys–

Now see I can to write a romantic story.

It even had the heaving boooossoms.

Now if you will excuse me. I’m going to take another hit of NyQuil then it’s off to do research. I’m watching soap operas in an effort to improve my writing skills.

Hugs and kisses.

Auntie Slacker.

Oh and for the inevitable person who might suggest I would have better luck if I was more gentle of temperment.

Pfffffsssss…..

Of course it’s sad. I’d have to be a machiochist to like this situation.

and yeah I probably didn’t spell that correctly either.

shessh.

Next up?

I dunno. Let’s try Marriages for one thousand,

But just incase you missed it. Nothing says elder statesman like President GW Bush turkey bowling!!

Cya tomorrow Gentle Reader, when I do the illustrated and annotated version of Dreamtime for you reading pleasure. Hugs and kisses!!!

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0 commentsDreamtime
Posted Jan-06-09 06:49:30 PST Updated Jan-06-09 16:06:52 PSTMathew flipped her and now he was the one on top.

He leaned over her. Both her hands pinned to the ground. She started to spit at him but he managed to miss it. “Maria, you’re getting to be like your sisters. Soft and not worth much.” He put his face close to hers. “Next thing you know you’ll be kissing and having babies.”

He kissed her…

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0 commentsDreamtime continued
Posted Jan-06-09 06:46:48 PST Updated Jan-06-09 16:04:42 PSTMathew smiled at Maria’s aggrivation.

“You know he does this on purpose. It’ rattles you. Throws you off your game. You’re getting soft. Next thing you know you’ll be sweet on him.” As soon as he said it, Mathew regretted the words. He and Maria had grown up with each other. When they were kids, they’d wrassled together. She could anticipate his next moves like a mind reader. Knew sometime before he did. Next thing he knew, he was on his back with Maria on top of him. Only this time, he liked it.

“Take it back.” she was yelling at him. Instead he just laughed and told her no. To his amusement this made her angrier. He managed to get his hands free. Stretched out as best he could with her on top of him and put his hands behind his head as if he were relaxing.

“No. I will not take it back. You’re getting soft. Like a girl. It really is funny to watch.”

“I am no–”

She didn’t get a chance to finish…
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0 commentsDreamtime cont
Posted Jan-06-09 06:42:34 PST Updated Jan-06-09 07:47:46 PST”I expect he’s lying. All guitar players have calouses. All of them. Either he has them or he doesn’t. I can’t believe that you’re not calling him on this.”

They’d somehow forgotten that Mathew was with them.

“You’re getting soft Maria.”

“When my hands are wet, the calous are soft. It’s difficult to feel them. Doesn’t mean that I’m lying.” The sound in Chris’s voice was different. No anger. “I’m telling you the truth.” He held out his hand again. “Just feel my hand again.” When she shook her head and said, “No.” he turned around and walked off…
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0 commentsDreamtime continued
Posted Jan-06-09 06:36:36 PST Updated Jan-06-09 16:01:08 PSTInsert heaving bossoms here…

yeah I probably “missed spelled” it.

This is also a very good time to remind you that, because I am an excellent writer, you might have thought that I was a romantic person who liked puppies, sunsets, and long walks on the beach. Well yes I like those things but they are really terrible gauges of a persons love life.

I like those things and my love life exists only because it is crap.

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0 commentsDreamtime continued
Posted Jan-06-09 06:33:33 PST Updated Jan-06-09 15:58:48 PSTMaria turned.

She looked at him standing there with his hands outstretched and realized that in all the time they’d known each other, they’d never touched. Never. The sight of him standing there with hand outstretched put her in a panic. She couldn’t move. Chris began to laugh at her, “So you’re afraid to find out that you’re wrong? Go on. Feel my finger tips. They won’t lie even if my words might.” He walked up to her and took her hand. At first to prove he was telling the truth but then because he had the sudden desire to kiss her. But he figured with the look on her face that she might hit him. He’d made do with holding her hand. When he reached out for it he was surprised at her reaction. Suddenly, she was as soft as any of the girls in town. She rubbed the tips of his fingers and instead of a challege to his honesty she said simply, ” I don’t feel them. The calouses. I don’t feel them.” Then she did the most extraordinary thing. She took his hand in both of hers and then traced with her finger tips the lines that palm readers used to tell the future. Was she wondering if her path and his future would intersect some how? He couldn’t tell. She turned his hand over to look at the back of it. Then she felt the tips of his fingers again…

She looked at his face and for the first time saw the color of his eyes. The shape of his face. She took a deep breath and looked down at his hands…”
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0 commentsDreamtime continues
Posted Jan-06-09 06:31:40 PST Updated Jan-06-09 07:32:23 PST”There was an instant attraction between them that made them argue more. Everything about the situation was wrong. He was from a rival clan. She was opinionated and told him about it. In her clan, the women were as strong as the men. Leadership was not determined by sex but by competence. This bothered him…”

Okay, I have to warn you about something. There will probably be sex involved in this particular interactive story. Not gratuitious sex. It’s necessary sex. But still. I’ll give you a heads up before you get to that part.

Now where were we. Oh yeah.

“This bothered him.

He didn’t know why. When ever she was around him he would bicker. Or he would tell her outrageous lies to see what she’d say. At first, she was respectful but when what he told her became unbelieveable she began to challenge him. Gently. Mathew wasn’t any help. When ever Chris would start in with his stories, Mathew would make it worse by asking him questions about when and where it happened. Chris, who would by then be caught up in the tall tale would add even more proposterous claims. Which of course led to challeges by Maria. It was that she would challege what he said that made him even more angry.

A vicious circle that would flustrate Maria to no end.

Finally she could take it no more. “I don’t believe you.” she looked him square in the eye when she said it. Then she repeated the words and turned to walk away.

Now as luck would have it, this time, Chris was telling the truth and he could prove it. “Come back here and feel my hands. I can prove what I say. Just feel my hands…”

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