oct 2008 pg1

Archive – October 20080 commentsHappy Holidays!
Posted Oct-31-08 23:32:02 PDT Updated Nov-02-08 21:47:13 PSTYou know this kind of sums up the holidays for me:


Kind heart met kind heart

And formed that day





Half a heart.

When the other half is so out of reach is worse torture than a heart none at all…”


“…A sun plant” is ” grown in the shaddows,…” it can grow “… sickly in it’s desperation to reach the light of the sun…”

Hannah Murphy 1 October, 2008


The beasts that chase us through times door

Can catch us not. So I implore

That you have faith in God’s sweet love

And his fairness from up above.

From spark of time we did know

That no matter what this life did show

From birth to death, yes we would know

We’d alway know each other


for the “husband of my heart”

Love Letter: Path of Infinite Steps


My heart walked alone to get here.

Across deserts and time.

Waited like the seed of the Rose in the Desert.

Waited until the rains to bloom.

This world makes me fierce to survive

But my head on your shoulder

Your kiss on my cheek?

I am soft and new again.

My breath, your laughter

Alive in my heart.



Angels align with knights
feet firmly on the ground
…and yet…
They still swim amongst Love’s stars
like astronauts
not all are starcrossed


…Once upon a time…

I wait with bags packed

at Love’s door

time to go home

Long life

written in warm heart not cold stone


Iron Chassis

Happy (Insert holiday here) to you and yours…

xxx ooo

The folks here at 12 dogs

Cause no matter where you go?

Okay. I’m pretty sure that if my mother read this post, she would first say, “humm,Ann What will people think?” Then she would want me to reassure you all that I haven’t lost my mind. I would remind her that I am a writer and write about alot of different situations. Not just the sweet. So for those who might now worry for my sanity. Like my Mother. Don’t. I’m fine. Life here keeps me from falling over into the “mental abyss”.

This is such a story.Three story threads in one. Coming together to reunite two very real hearts. This is my story. My words. A story begun long before “The Man and the Woman” story. Long before…

It starts somewhere in Wicklow Mountains. I guess even before that. Long before Fate had gathered two strands, two lives, and bound them.

It is the writing of a wrong and the righting of that wrong.

A love story. But not the unhappy one of Heathcliff and Cathy.

“Kind heart met kind heart and that day formed Love.”

Sigh bear with me people.

Oh and for those who wondered. My life and this whole blog has been the “Alice story”.

Okay let’s us proceed.

Just so you’ll know Gentle Reader. With the exception of the song in the video? I wrote the words on this post. I’ve put them in quotes because they were written in earlier. I brought them forward together to form this post. The part that talks about angels and knights was written about the world and also about specific relationships.

There was some question about my writing using quotes. LOL I made up the characters I quoted and the quotes. Since I’m the author of these characters as well? I can change the quote without worry. I just don’t because I like to think of these characters as unique. Should respect their “words”. Makes it easier to write for them too.


Song: Wuthering Heights
Artist: Kate Bush

With one foot on one stone in the middle of a stream. In Wicklow Mountains she did see time slow for her. Time loved her and she loved Time.

But how to make it be…

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0 commentsNo matter where you go?
Posted Oct-30-08 00:32:40 PDT Updated Jan-14-09 06:18:51 PST

There you are.

There are folks in this world who can say unkind things.

I know folks who really have struggled with their weight. One lovely person who lost alot of weight. Sweet, nice guy. These two would think him quite handsome now but I was his friend when they’d be calling him a hippo waiting to eat them. What is it about weight that makes folks say such mean and stupid things?

(6:34 mark til the end of the video).

Whenever I hear such nonsense?

I count my blessings.

I listen to a silly song.

Roger Miller

You Can’t Rollerskate in a Buffalo Herd

Yeah it’s weird, wacky, and slightly off center but it’s fun.

I wonder what would happen if Tryork suddenly shaved off all his hair, put on his Yfronts (you know the ones I’m talking about ladies), and then danced…

I start to beeeleeeeeve in miracles. I do…

Or I remember that while the world is way too tense? There really is no place like home.

(Sigh, I love Sesame Street.)

Or I listen to Lily Allen sing The Beatle’s song

Mr. Blue Sky

It puts a smile on my face.

I think of politics.

Wonder what would have happened if Joe the Plumber had been a Josephine…

Then I remind myself of future adventures.

Because no matter where you go?

There you are?

If that doesn’t work?

I think of the resurection of Brittney…

And those cockeyed optimists of the world…

Everytime I need a reality check?

I laugh about the absurd things in life.

Like 12 dogs.

Or that there are more important things to remember.

Like the answer to K8’s question.

It puts the stupid things people say in perspective.

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0 commentsTo K8,
Posted Oct-29-08 12:49:13 PDT Updated Oct-30-08 01:52:43 PDTA serious answer to her serious question about presidential choices.

Post :

Hey K8,

You tell folks who you vote for?

Hmm. You live with a Republican and you raised a Democrat?

Since your family’s choices affect your vote?

Well you could look at it like this. Each night when you look over at the otherside of the bed and say, “G’nigh Honey.”. Who is it that you’re saying, “Goodnight” to?

Then work it out with yourself and them.

I’m serious here.

Our grown children will make up their own minds and will love us regardless.

The folks who like us or don’t here on eBay and out in the world will still like us or not regardless of who we vote for. If they don’t? Well maybe they aren’t the friend we thought they were.

But significant others?

Well, Kate, they’re within elbow distance each night when we snore. They are the one who will hold our hand when we get “old and gray”. They are the one who will hopefully be there no matter what the rest of the world does. They are the one who will consider our feelings as well as their own. They are the person who you should talk to. Sit down and ask them why they are voting the way they are and then ask yourself what is important to you. Which candidate will be more likely to be your advocate in the world? This is true wheither or not your significant other is a Democrat or a Republican.

Then I hope you will both vote.

As for how I’m deciding? I don’t tell folks how I actually vote. I do however gladly tell folks what criteria I use when I vote. You’re welcome to email me. My neighbor talked to me about the vote. I’d be glad to do same for you if you want.

I’m sorry I missed your chat about this but would be glad to chat via eBay email. Just let me know.

Hugs to you Kate.

Sorry to have been so serious.


Auntie Slacker


The Vote/ How I’ll decide?


Well I don’t know about you but I could use a laugh so

Everytime I need a reality check?

Take care, Ann

Comments Off.
Email off.

I’m sorry. I’m not trying to ignore. I just might not have time to answer. I might miss your comment or email. Didn’t want you to think that you were being ignored. Will answer emails this weekend.

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0 commentsThe Vote/ How to decide?
Posted Oct-27-08 06:19:36 PDT Updated Oct-28-08 05:56:38 PDTI’m a grown up.

The president must be one too. This isn’t the presidency that has the luxury of failure. Our country is deeply in debt. Deeply in debt. And it is a world economy where we need a strong advocate for the United States. Not Europe. Europe isn’t our big buddy. It is our competitor. We do cordial business with Europe but they aren’t our friends. Not like friends you and I might have in our own lives. Anyone could say there are problems. Duh. But only a grown up will have the wisdom of solution in the next 4 years. Wisdom and experience.

Sailboat folks. They understand the importance of experience and wisdom. I remember watching my father at the helm. He would sit there quietly. Didn’t look like he did much. But he could take that huge boat and move it about like a toy. He had wisdom. He understood the realities of his boat and the waters in which it sailed. And he had experience of the past and wisdom for the future for his boat and it’s safe passage through rough waters.

A steady hand. Resolute.

I’ve been told I don’t understand politics. Me being a southern Red Neck I must be a backwards so in so. Me who seriously considered voting for Sen. Clinton.


While I thought about my vote? I pondered the events in my own life.

This weekend I was told I didn’t understand and never would from a woman who had told me that her life was grim. I worried for her during huricanes and when she told me that her father was ill. I could understand having faced my own “terribles”. The death of an infant son from incompetence. The days of my 8 dollar shoes. Having given up parts of my dreams for the realities of my family. I worried for her because I’d seen rough times myself. Alone. I understood.

This weekend she told me that none of it was true.

Called it a fiction. All of it.

Told me I wouldn’t understand.

She from the beginning told me she was my friend and yet she tells me now that everything she said about her life was a fiction.

I just never would understand she said.

I understand plenty.

Alot like I understand the empty promises of politicians I knew her words to be the empty promises of friendship. The empty words that demands total loyalty to their fiction. When questioned? Their promised friendship and promises of the future had no substance.

So what to do?

There’s a saying applied to politics:

“Better the devil you know than the one you don’t.”

And here at our house when it comes to friends?

Better the friend who tells the truth that you don’t want to hear than the one who tells you a fiction that you do want to hear.

The friend that tells the hard truth as well as the pretty stories will be there during the hard times.

Fair weather friends tell you pretty stories then leave when times get rough.

Foul weather friends tell you pretty stories but also the truth. You can disagree with them or agree, but they are still there no matter the weather. They are the traveling companions that are good to know when times get rough.

Same for politicians. Those who promise only pretty fiction without looking also at the realities?

How can they bring true hope and change?

How can they bring true friendship?

I understand.

I don’t mind telling a pretty story to get someone through rough times. To entertain. I tell lovely stories here at 12 dogs. I also tell stories to illustrate a point. I give people in rough times a place “to be”. But I also tell folk when they are fiction or I try to tell you the fact behind it. A fiction writer tells you up front when a story is fiction. And there is fiction on 12 dogs for sure. But I have told you this like a fiction writer does. There is truth here too. Sad and difficult truth. For sad truth? Look to the end of the next post.

This doesn’t indicate the direction in which I will vote.

This tells one of many ways in which I will make my choice.

This week I will begin the long, serious evaluation of my vote.

But I must say.

The folks who would be my fair weather friends during this political cycle did me a favor by the way they have acted.

Thank you for helping me make my voting decision with a clear conscious and confidence I’ve not had in a long time. I have the compass and wisdom to make my choice. I have a clear set of criteria by which I will make my decision.

This morning I woke up.

This morning I understand.

PS Thank you to my neighbor who took the time to talk to me yesterday. I know that you were busy.

Thank you.

I am proud and lucky to be an American too. 🙂

Next some humor to get you through the day.

Everytime I need a reality check?

Comments Off

Still reading and answering Emails from friends.

I can’t say that it will influence my vote but I am always glad to listen to what a friend has to say.

Thanks for the input!

As for 12 dogs. I will be spending the week with my son. I’ll have plenty to write. Some about the election. Some about life. But my reality of life will be spent happily with my son and my pups. While there is sad in my life? My son and dogs have reminded me of the Hope and kindness of the world.

I think that will be the best use of my time.


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1 commentEverytime I need a reality check?
Posted Oct-25-08 18:06:05 PDT Updated Oct-26-08 01:24:01 PDT
Ah Sunday morning and the sound of politicians is in the air. Well that and the sound of the “spin docs” hot on their heels.

You know, whenever I think of the “annoying” people in my life, I think of my favorite metaphor: The Hemorrhoid. Wheither the person be sufferin from a “hemorrhoid” the size of a tiny, tiny, pea OR the size of a “…good size grape…” Or the size of a basketball?

They are all just a pain in the butt.

So I went on youTube to find refuge from the “hemorrhoids metaphors” in my life and found —

A Festival of hemorrhoid fun.

Welcome to

Auntie Slacker’s Festival O’ Hemorrhoid Fun

A Film Festival .

I’m thinking of selling tshirts.

But, “Why are you doing this Auntie Slacker?” you ask.

Well I’ll tell ya’.


And I may have lost a friend.

I like this person.

And well


And well

Thanks to this election cycle. I have met some nice folks but I have met no end (pun intended) of Azz holes with Hemorrhoids. A right epidemic. I feel bad for them. Sure they’re annoying and you and I would like to “slap the cr@ p” out of them. Butt hey(another pun intended). We at 12 dogs believe that “Having fun is the best revenge” so we’ve taken pity. Decided to make our cause “celebratty”.

A real “help an Azz hole get rid of their hemorrhoids” festival.

We, along with Mark Apsolon and others, are gonna try and send them “haters” and “spin doctors” some Preparation H.

Shrink their “egos” down to size.

For a better explanation of the problem and hopeful solution?

A PSA for Hemorroids:

Folks these are the types of metaphorical hemorrhoids that mythologies are built around. They’re gonna need the extra big, economy sized tube of Preparation H.

Our festival begins with a grape sized hemorrhoid of fun.

Our patron saint of hemorrhoids —

Hannah, “The Pregnancy Coach”, Hemorrhoid.

LOL I don’t know about you but if I was “10 months pregnant” with hemorrhoids? This is the last person I’d want to be around.

“Hello! I’m Hannah, “The Annoying Voice”, pregnancy coach. I’m here to make your pregnancy a misery.”

Now this Hannah is not Hannah Murphy.

If you slapped Hannah Murphy? She might slap ya back.

Nope is is another Hannah.

Please feel free to “slap the crap” out of Hannah. I wouldn’t. It would be mean. Hey you have an excuse. You are in labor, 10 months pregnant, you have hemorrhoids, and some insane person (your husband) convinced you that real women don’t do epidurals. Slap away. No one will blame you.

Oh and your husband?

May he pass a kidney stone the size of your hemorrhoids.

And what’s a festival without music?

Let’s all dance to

The Hemorrhoid Fart Dance

LOL Juicy fart.

But just what is this thing called a hemorrhoid you ask.?

(Hint 6:34 mark til the end of the video).

Ooohhh. “Celebratty” Alert!

That would have been one of those “metaphorical hemorrhoids”, Tv’s Craig Ferguson. You can tell he is a “basketball sized hemorrhoid” from the way he talks about “…fat people…” around the 6:35 minute mark of this video.

LOL Maybe there will be a heart felt monologue on Monday.

Forgiveness! Love! Orlando Bloom! Vegas! The agony of itchy hemorrhoids! They sure can be a trial.

More words of wisdom.

Let’s all tune in.

LOL Now where were we?

Oh yeah…

Mr. Ferguson is a metaphor for —

The Hypertrophic Hemorrhoid.

(due to the graphic nature of this video we’re gonna need to see some ID and a note from your momma before you can watch this)


For the “wasting your college tuition” competition?

Fart Bubbles.

Mom and dad will be so proud.

More music? Well if it’s Auntie Slacker? And a hemorrhoid festival?

Weeeeeellll …


Well heck that was depressing.

Must be a

(insert political party that pzzes you off here)


A PSA from the RedNeck Nation.

Just hang in there they’ll get to it.

First they have to talk about the important stuff.

Like George Bush’s colonoscopy.

(I think that’s how you spell it.)

“…you’re sore, you’re bleeding alittle bit, but at least they know wheither you’re dying or not…”

“… I can’t believe they did that to our comander and chief…”

Personally I can’t believe they made him go ride a bicycle after that

Talk about taking one for the team

More vids for the festival soon!!

LOL Having fun really is the best revenge.LOL

The more I see of people?

The more I love my dogs.

xxx ooo

Auntie Slacker

12 dogs and a blog

Thanks for coming.

PS. A PSA from Auntie and the guys at 12 dogs

If ya’ gotta get yer “beer buzz” on for Mass.

Because someone else did you wrong.

That is the first step to becoming and alcoholic.

You don’t get it.

I hope someday that you will.

We sure do.

When life hands ya lemons?

And the good Lord knows that we’ve seen our share.

We make a lemon flip.

We sure try too.

Havin’ fun is the best therapy.

We don’t pull the wings off butterflies or angels.

We make jokes.

An we hope all dogs go to heaven in the end.


Reality Calling

Our reality.

WB’s brother dying, my great aunts death, my sis in law’s father dying? Or my great uncle’s death? That was just in the last 10 months. Heck Mae dog was hit by a car? Dead.

Billy’s death in the last 2 years.

That doesn’t count the death of my infant child who spent his whole life in a hospital.

Please don’t get me started about problems with medical care.

And Irish David leaving.

The death of a good friend and neighbor. A man who took us, complete strangers, into his home. Taught me what I know about chickens. Treated us as kind as family.

The deaths of:

WB’ grandmother and other brother.

The deaths of:

Both of my grandmothers, My grandfather, my aunt, my uncle and my cousin.

Our pup that was a member of the family for 15 years.

Or Tweety.

I sat down and started counting the number of very real deaths in my and WB’s family.

All deaths and very real. No characters in a “…beautiful book…”

And all the other stuff that’s happened in my life is very real.

I’m writing this because 12 dogs is my writing journal and fact and fiction live here.

I just thought I’d clear up the facts in my life.

Someone asked. About the fact and the fiction.

Well here’s a fact.

I could have become an alchoholic.

Mercy knows I had plenty of ways to excuse it.

I didn’t because it would have just added one more sad thing to a list of sad in my life.

Sad that I didn’t cause.

But drinking that one I would have caused.

It’s easy to do.

And because of Pup. That was the biggest reason.

I wasn’t going to be drunk and not be able to help Pup if he needed me.

So if I hear of a friend drinking to escape the bad?

I tell them that is not a good idea.

No fiction there.

Sorry if it made you mad.

A friend is someone who likes you enough to hear the bad and the good and they still like you.

Friends and family who love us?

That makes it better.

I get it. Just hope another person does too.

Hope this gave you a great big grin or laugh if your days is going “tits over azz”. Or you are in your “hurricane hole” with the one you love. Even if the rest of the world is giving you a hard time of it (Take It Easy)? I hope you can smile. That’s the great thing about being able to write and to laugh. The ability to make someone else smile. Especially if they haven’t smiled in a long, long time.

Gift of laughter is a gift from God.

Hope this gave you a happy.

And don’t forget the Preparation H.

LOL Thank you Mark Apsolon. Whoever you are. Your video gave us all here a good laugh.

And thank you Mr. Ferguson. That was a jerk thing to say and a crap apology. But you did that lovely rant on voting. So again thanks for that.

Hugs to ya.


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0 commentsThe Hypertrophic Hemorrhoid
Posted Oct-25-08 15:59:09 PDT Updated Oct-25-08 18:41:44 PDTWhich looks like this:

(this is graphic but accurate)

Sorry this video was deemed too graphic for our ebay sensiblities. We have replaced it with this entertaining McCain Rap video. Hmm Sec. of Treasury Meg Whitman….Hmmm hypnotic aint it…

Okay that one was removed for language.


Well how about a PSA for voting. Thanks President Bush!!

Vote! See http://www.maps.google.com/vote

Man oh man. So we remember CF’s vote rant.

Maybe he’s just a regular hemorrhoid and not a massive one.

Now back to the Auntie Slacker’s Festival of Hemorrhoid Fun Film Festival

click >Everytime I need a reality check?
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0 commentsEvery time I need a reality check?
Posted Oct-25-08 15:07:12 PDT Updated Oct-25-08 16:13:48 PDTLOL I don’t know about you but if I was “10 months pregnant” with hemorrhoids? This is the last person I’d want to be around.

“Hello! I’m Hannah, “The Annoyan’ Voice”, pregnancy coach. I’m here to make your pregnancy a misery.”

I know that there’s no way I’d want her to have anything to do with my back passage.

If that doesn’t put you in a mood?

Watch this video (6:34 mark til the end of the video). LOL Maybe there will be a heart felt monologue on Monday. About forgiveness. And love.

The more I see of people

The more I like my dogs.

12 dogs and a blog

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0 commentsEverytime I need a reality check?
Posted Oct-25-08 11:24:58 PDT Updated Oct-29-08 13:08:54 PDTI watch this video (6:34 mark til the end of the video). LOL Maybe there will be a heart felt monologue on Monday. About forgiveness. And love.

The more I see of people.

The more I like my dogs.

Whenever I think of this and of the folks who have called me friend?

I just watch this video.

A sad reminder.

The more I think see of people

The more I know I like my dogs.

A Zen Garden for kind hearts

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1 commentFrom The Children’s Hour by Henry Wadsworth Longfellow
Posted Oct-23-08 14:06:20 PDT Updated Oct-24-08 21:20:49 PDT


Between the dark and the daylight,
When the night is beginning to lower,
Comes a pause in the day’s occupations,
That is known as the Children’s Hour


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0 commentsHey. A break in the writing
Posted Oct-22-08 15:38:24 PDT Updated Oct-27-08 07:01:54 PDTHello Gentle Reader.

Well I thought I should write something here about this current section of the blog. First? Hugs. Second? Hugs.

I’m going to need them.

This part is alittle different. And some sad.

I learned from a very good writer that not all of life and writing is happy. Some –is sad. Some writing is dark. Just like parts of life. The last couple of days have been all over the happy sad world for me.

I have, it looks, lost an internet friend. We couldn’t work things out. We did part in a good way if that is possible. We left the door open. I just wasn’t the person they needed to talk to right now.

Then, another internet friend, someone who I’d talked to along time ago, reentered my life. This is a person who is happy with their life. While their life hasn’t always been easy things are pretty good. Their happy is rubbing off on me in a good way. Or so I thought. Stupid me.

And that has got me to writing. And then brought it to a halt. Seems that it was another in a long line of jerks. Only this was worse. It was someone who I thought was a real friend. But alas, it was just another person who made me pay for other folk’s actions. I was kind to them, I was a friend to them, and yet for some reason I was the one that had to get stomped on.

Made perfect sense to them I guess. Oh, I know. I’ll just dust myself off and be all sunny and optimistic. Unsinkable. Tough as nails. Nothing bothers me. People can just waltz into my life. Then waltz out. Like some dumb old dog I just give a big old dog grin. 🙂

I know that what’s on 12 dogs is sad. But you know me by now Gentle Reader. I’m not going to leave it sad for long. I guess that’s the thing about this friend. They reminded me that with the sweet comes some bitter too. They reminded me in a way that only they could not to let myself get close to anyone. Don’t get vulnerable. Don’t let down your guard. Line the road to your heart with broken glass. The appropriate response to the men of the world is,”Fcuk off”. Vibrators, electric blankets, and a dog that’s all ya’ need. Hey make sure to build a wall around your feelings. Don’t let your guard down for a second. I really should send them a thank you note for teaching me such a valuable lesson. Wow.

I’m so much smarter.

I wonder if Hallmark makes a card for that.

So even if it looks sad now not to worry.

I’ve got faith it will work out. After all. I’m beautiful inside. Someone’s gonna see that and just be my friend and love me. LOL Yeah right.

I’m not broken but there are alot of folks who are. Now if they could be kind enough to keep clear of me? I wouldn’t want to waste their time with such things as friendship.

There’s a reason to be a cactus.

Are we having fun yet? That is important. That you have fun watching me get kicked. For me to be entertaining in my pain. For the sadists in the room.

How about a lecture on how the universe is unfolding as it should. That being kicked over and over is as it should be. No it’s not. Or that this alone time is necessary for my development. I love how that usually comes from happily coupled people.

I’ve clocked in enough time being alone thanks.

I’ve had it with jerks.

Okie dokie.

Gentle Reader, don’t worry about little old me.

I have something to keep me occupied.

An election.

And I vote. 🙂

You have a good one. I know I will.


It is amazing what a hurt heart can say. Especially one that has been sadly treated. But the good news is that as long as there is a heart. Even a bruised one? There is Hope and future. I wanted to say that too.

But I do think that enough is enough. That there are folks who take advantage. In this case? No more.

I am a very kind and nice person. Someone who will, if I am honest, will continue to be friend. I’ve tried to be jaded but someone will say a kind word. Like a neighbor on yesterday’s walk. She stopped and talked to me even though she was busy about the important things in her life. We traded news about a neighbor who was also kind. Not politician kind. Practical kind. The kind that check on folks during huricanes because they are just that nice.

Or my son will hug my neck and tell a joke.

He’s a good kid my son. Could have turned out not so good but he didn’t. Alot of prayers went out as he’s been growing up.

So I can’t say that no one will get close to my heart. They will. They already have.

But I do want and need this traveling companion.

I am waiting patiently but you’ll have to come here to me.

I already have good faith.

This is about yours.

My traveling companion?

I decide if it is written in stone. Not anyone else.

Although I am glad if you are friend and trying to help. 😀

Always glad to have a friend.

I just wanted to write this.


From The Children’s Hour by Henry Wadsworth Longfellow…

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0 commentsSome one commented on my last post and…
Posted Oct-22-08 14:00:14 PDT Updated Oct-22-08 14:26:58 PDT

…reminded me to look out at life in a positive way. Use this time to concentrate on who I am as a person. That God would work things out in his own time.

What are ya’ gonna’ do.

This is a good person who wrote this. They didn’t mean it to intrude or pontificate. Truth is they’d been on some pretty dark roads that they didn’t make. Kind person. Can’t yell at ’em.

Some folks are like that. Nice with loads of personal experience to back up their beliefs.

So I said thank you.


I should have also told them of the years and years and years of experience I have of doing things on my own. Of finding myself. How I rejoice when folk find someone. But really, if I got to know myself anymore I’d be in danger of becoming a Narcissistic jerk.

There are alot of people in the world.

I met one I liked.

Only he was gay.

I met another one I liked.

He liked me alot too.

Only I was told I’d lose my son if that went through.

Now I’m told to work on myself?

See that’s the thing.

Myself is fine.


I want company.

A traveling companion.

I’m pretty nice and I’ve put up with alot of grief in my life. I really have.

I don’t feel trapped.

I feel, frankly?


As you may remember from my last posting…

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0 commentsAs you may remember from my last posting…
Posted Oct-22-08 10:19:42 PDT Updated Oct-24-08 20:53:11 PDT

I was doing research for the following story.

All this talk about my love life (or lack of) got me to thinking-

What hell would be for a sadist?
Think about it.

sadist n : someone who obtains pleasure from inflicting pain on others [see AuthorAnn’s lovelife]

If you’re a person “…who obtains pleasure…”, sexual or otherwise, “…from inflicting pain on others…”, unless you are the devil himself just what would hell look like? I mean you put this a sadist around firey brimstone and tortured souls and they’d be all, “woohoo. Honey I home.” No — traditional hell would be like some luxury spa would be to Paris Hilton. Fun. Not at all the point of hell and eternal damnation. Of course your skin would be all smooth and shiney and you’d be the sadist’s version of all relaxed and refreshed. But in hell? No.
So what would hell look like to a sadist?
In a word?


I don’t know that St. Peter’s gonna be having a sadist roam the streets of heaven though.


So I begin ponder this question. I began to look for answer. Heck, didn’t look like I was gonna get answers to my love life so why not look for answers to the closest thing to it.

That is what I’m going to be doing this morning.
First I’m looking on youTube and then I’m looking on Wiki.

Maybe that’ll help.

So I went looking for all the possible hells for a sadistic person on youTube.

First stop?

Now you may be saying to yourself,

“But I like Donna Reid. She’s nice. Funny. She has all the answers to life’s perplexing quesions. In 30 minutes or less. In heels. Without breaking a sweat.”

Yes she does.

She is unflappable in her “domestic goddess” life style.

Woman makes Rachael Ray look like one of Jimmy Buffet’s fruitcakes.

pfffffs. Yeppers definate sadist’s hell.

Tormented for all eternity with nice.



Can’t be this easy.

Then I got a visit from the Jerk Fairy. Guess what.

I’m still thinking.

Maybe their love live should be as dismal as mine.

Or as good as mine.

If mine is good? There’s is good.

If mine is terrible? There’s is terrible.

Now there’s a thought.

Next up on 12 dogs and a blog?

It’s a post about my own little private Idaho.

You know folks?

The more I see of Love?
The more I love my dogs.

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0 commentsHell is what you make it?
Posted Oct-22-08 08:17:01 PDT Updated Oct-22-08 10:41:30 PDT

All this talk about my love life (or lack of) got me to thinking-

What hell would be for a sadist?

Think about it.

sadist n : someone who obtains pleasure from inflicting pain on others [see AuthorAnn’s lovelife]

If you’re a person “…who obtains pleasure…”, sexual or otherwise, “…from inflicting pain on others…”, unless you are the devil himself just what would hell look like? I mean you put this a sadist around firey brimstone and tortured souls and they’d be all, “woohoo. Honey I home.” No — traditional hell would be like some luxury spa would be to Paris Hilton. Fun. Not at all the point of hell and eternal damnation. Of course your skin would be all smooth and shiney and you’d be the sadist’s version of all relaxed and refreshed. But in hell? No.

So what would hell look like to a sadist?

In a word?


I don’t know that St. Peter’s gonna be having a sadist roam the streets of heaven though.


So I begin ponder this question. I began to look for answer. Heck, didn’t look like I was gonna get answers to my love life so why not look for answers to the closest thing to it.

Hell for my ex boyfriends.

That is what I’m going to be doing this morning.

Researching all the possible hell’s for the sadists in my life.

First I’m looking on youTube and then I’m looking on Wiki.

If this doesn’t answer the question, Gentle Reader, I hear that there’s a book on Amazon, How Do I Tell If My Boyfriend’s The Anti Christ.

Maybe that’ll help.

Next up on 12 dogs and a blog?

It’s a post about my own little private Idaho.

You know folks?

The more I see of Love?

The more I love my dogs.

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0 commentsThe more I see of Love?
Posted Oct-22-08 07:12:52 PDT Updated Oct-22-08 07:14:00 PDT

The more I Love my dogs…

Dear Billy,

Right now I am hanging from a “cliff” by one hand. Surely there is another option.
This isn’t my home. If this isn’t my home how can I expect to find a life here. Imagine if someone took you from the Ocean. Took you to a place where no matter how hard you tried they wouldn’t accept you. You had no one. No ocean to keep you company until you found home?

Surely there is a resolution better than this. I found a way for a girl on the cliff in a story. I did it by thinking outside of the box. I have over and over found resolutions for others. Over and over thought out side the box. Now I need home, a real home. Just like having home helped you. I would like this home and WB can’t seem to give that to me. He doesn’t know how and I don’t know if it would be fair to ask him to do this anymore.
Last night he couldn’t even give me a conversation.
I get more companionship and conversation from an image on the tv screen each night than I get from WB. And since WB doesn’t talk back when I talk to him why should anyone think it odd if I talk to my television. It listens and talks back to me just like WB. Meaning it doesn’t. What’s the difference?
My restlessness here isn’t just the “sap rising”.
It’s a big world. If I were a man? Fate and every woman around would be tripping over themselves to get me “matched up”. No matter what I looked like.
I need to write. I need home to do this. Trust me being happy with someone will NOT mess with my ability to write. I remember me with IrishDavid.
You can’t keep me company and I’m tired of talking to my tv set and my dogs. Pup will leave and I’ll be alone.
He doesn’t kiss me on the head and hug my neck and say, “write”.

I stayed with Pup. I love Pup but he can’t be my husband.
You didn’t find home on your own. Friends introduced you. Surely there is someone. The world is so big.
It just doesn’t look like that someone is here.

I’m sorry. You are my friend. You asked what was the matter. I am a kind of lonely no one should be. I swear that I couldn’t have done anything so wrong as to be this lonely. Boy do I miss you and IrishDavid. You just can’t imagine how much.
I’ve been shunned in my life.
This is worse than shunning.

I can write. I’m an excellent writer. But I need home and husband. Family. This business of the excentric starcrossed artist is just for the birds. Were you a miserable starcrossed artist? No you weren’t. Why am I supposed to be?

Knowing and asking what you need isn’t being ungrateful.

He can tell me that he loves me to the cows come home but if he doesn’t have a clue who I am?

Then what does he love?

God keeps me company but surely he can’t want me to be this kind of alone.

Hugs and hugs again,

I miss you. If I close my eyes I can see you. I can watch you dance. I can still remember your voice. I can’t remember IrishDavids. Just remember the “hi ya” but that is all. I miss him too. I’m too young to be kept company by memories. I am on strike to meet anyone here. Either I get a husband, WB gets a clue, or someone does.

This is where I put my foot down.

I just have to have faith that when I do there will be solid ground underneath that foot.

That canyon looks pretty durn deep.

Author Ann

Please note. I told someone earlier that I believed in God and that belief had seen me through some rough times. They’re reaction was that we’d both found peace in our hearts and both found God. If they’re reading this, I do believe in God and pray everyday. Like a kind of conversation. But…

“…No not peace. Not like you are describing. I do have God in my heart. But having God in my heart doesn’t mean I’m experiencing Nivana. Nope. I have a sense of God to call on when I didn’t have anyone. Some days I embrace the gift of it and some days I cling to it like a life raft. Some days I yell and ask what kind of friend God can be. Some days? I thank God for being the friend others can’t…”

There will be folks who will say that if I had God in my heart, that this letter wouldn’t be possible. Yes it is. I live in the world. I pray to God everyday. Like a friend that knows me from way back. One who likes me anyway. On the zit days.

One of them was Billy.

I can’t talk to Billy because he died.

It was a stupid waste of a talented man. The world became less when he died. I read though if you were trying to sort something out that writing a letter to a friend, like praying to God, is good. So I wrote one of the two men in my life who understood me. Billy would have been the perfect guy. He told his mom that we just where. It was true. The perfect guy except for one thing. He was gay and I wasn’t a guy.

A good portion of my friendship with Billy was spent writing letters.

I can’t talk to him anymore so I wrote him this letter.

We can’t always help the person we love. For Billy? Agape love was off the charts. Now Eros? LOL Bad time to be in Love.

My love life can be just a mess…

Some feelings? Soft

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2 commentsSoft
Posted Oct-21-08 18:56:53 PDT Updated Oct-21-08 19:46:36 PDT


Work in Progress

I feel as if I’m in the dark with my eyes wide open but I can not see

It’s not a frightening dark

It’s a soft, liquid, slightly out of focus dark

As I move through your mind

Everything is soft

Like down pillows and down comforters


Like feathers falling from the sky

Snow flakes


Like a whisper of a wisp

When I stumble and I fall?

I fall into clouds


Wisps of clouds like dust swirl up around me as I fall into the emotion

That’s how this afternoon felt

Words like






Sad…because a friend was leaving

A smile — because another friend had stayed

The day soft

I wrote the sorrow away from my heart

The emotions coraled into a box of words

Put back into Pandora’s Box

Only this time Hope

Outside the box


Falling up

As I move through the soft in slow motion

Soft word on the lips

My mind’s eye comforted

Writing in slow motion

My heart sings

Please don’t be angry with me

All unintentional

I have to write



Author Ann

21 October,2008


My Father

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1 commentMy Father
Posted Oct-21-08 17:18:20 PDT Updated Oct-21-08 20:37:08 PDT

My father. He taught me to read. Remember. I wrote about it here on the blog. My father really is from the woods of south Alabama. When he got older he ran away from home and joined the Merchant Marines. He and his brother went to Cuba. Later on in life he would sail his own boat to Cuba.

My dad and my mom.

My mom. She’s done so many things. If you ask she’ll tell you it’s because of my dad. Truth is it’s because of my Mom. She’s tough and she loves my dad fierce. So anything he can do, any place he can go, she goes too. That’s why I say it’s because of my mom too. She could have stayed home and decorated. Baked cookies. She just wasn’t an at home, cookie baking kind of mom.

She was an airplane flying, sailboat sailing, business woman, and teacher kind of mom.

I’m glad.

Because I’m not really a cookie baking kind of mom either.

I can bake cookies. I like being with family.

Just if you sat me down and asked?

I’d rather go on adventures.

Take my son with me instead of staying at home.

That’s me.

Everyone’s different. That’s good.

How I got to this place in my life.

So my father. He says to me, “…but there’s never been a writer.”

Then he says, ” You are a writer.” Maybe that would make the difference.

I dunno if it will.


Peace for my father

Peace for my mother

Peace for my son

Peace for my family all

Peace for me too.

Peace for us all.


“… Now I look at my front porch and this panoramic view
I can sit and watch the fields fill up
With rays of glowing sun
Or watch the moon lay on the fences
Like that’s where it was hung
My blessings are in front of me
It’s not about the land
I’ll never beat the view
From my front porch looking in …”

From My Frontporch Looking In

sung by


Next post Sun rises Taloolah.

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0 commentsSun rises Taloolah.
Posted Oct-20-08 04:01:24 PDT Updated Oct-20-08 05:42:49 PDTQuote of the day– “Sex is sex and love is love. Only when the two meet do you find marriage. Anything else is either the worlds oldest profession or like having a relationship with yer dear old mom.

Remember, it ain’t nice to sleep with yer mom.

And you better love your mate

Without the two? No marriage.

Of course there are some women or men who don’t mind this situation.

They are usually called “gold diggers” and are after a man’s or a woman’s money.”

It also ain’t nice to mess with Auntie.

She’s got teeth that are very sharp.

Auntie Slacker

“The strongest arguements of the heart’s own come from our own hearts and minds. Yes a parrot is a good mimic of the words of others. The thing is that a parrot has no real comprehension of what they say. While the author understands the words in ways the parrot will never be able to.” Auntie Slacker October 20,2000

It takes both agape and eros to make a full practical marriage.

I was asked if just eros would do. It would depend on the couple. Are they animal or human? An animal mates with sexual appetite. A human mates with love.

An animal cannot help themselves. They have no self control. A human being can have the same sexual appetite and yet say no to those desires.

There is love and affection in the human relationship while with animals there is only biology.

I jest. Kind of. I believe that the individual is a good indicator of how a marriage is defined for them.

But the ones that last? Have both Agape and Eros to survive lifes changes.

But then you may feel that a true marriage is like a Bic lighter. Disposable.

I don’t. Disposable is a business agreement. Business agreements are made on Earth. Marriages are made in heaven.

Good morning!!!!

Auntie Slacker

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0 commentsGood morning!!!!
Posted Oct-20-08 02:31:45 PDT Updated Oct-20-08 03:00:50 PDTGood morning Blogland

My goodness, I am sooo glad that this isn’t my life.

From the archives. A funny thing…
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0 commentsFrom the archives. A funny thing…
Posted Oct-19-08 22:57:50 PDT Updated Oct-19-08 23:31:57 PDTOriginal title?

Pygmallion and other modern day fables

There have been many stories of creation.

Mary Shelly had her Frankenstein. This was not a particularly happy tale about divine creation. It’s the tale of how that creation came back to its creator to yell at her for messing up and being such a crappy creator. I call this the story of puberty.

A clasic tale of creation and the one many of us are familiar with is the story of Adam and Eve. THE story of creation. Adam and Eve get great wedding gifts. Their parents give them land and a great house. Eve gets greedy, has an affair with a real snake who talks her into taking all Adam’s stuff through trickery and gets him and her thrown out of the Garden of Eden. I call this the first wife and her divorce settlement.

Then there is the story of Pygmallion. In this, the creator, a very lonely, desperate and picky man, can’t find a girl to save his life. So he makes one up. Out of marble. Yep, that would be about right. Picky man prefers his ideal woman to be made of cold, hard marble. Warm, soft, real women need not apply. She won’t wrinkle and her breasts won’t sag. But she’ll always be a bit indifferent. Of course the gods hear this request. After all he is a man. So they give him his girl. I haven’t read all. I don’t know if “the girl” is scorned and comes back to hunt her creator and tell him what a disaster he is. Like Frankenstein. Or his ex wife. If so, OH HAPPY DAY. With my luck they live happily ever after. I call this male mid life crisis meets 20 something, trophy girl friend and then marries her. Sigh.

What I want to know is this. Are there any stories where the mid life crisis is experienced by a woman and she gets her perfect guy. If you know of any let me know. Because I’m having a tough time finding Mr. Right. And I am a sculptor. Maybe we can work something out. Only I’m making my trophy husband outta clay so he’ll be warm. With a sense of humour.

More 12 dogs and a blog

In politics and love? More Than Words…

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0 commentsThank the Lord.
Posted Oct-19-08 19:44:15 PDT Updated Oct-19-08 20:46:28 PDT

The Late Late Show has new episodes this week.!!!

In the mean time here’s a blue light special to get you through until the next new show —

What did we learn tonight ?

Well that the Drew Carey Show is still one of the most imaginative on television.
Craig Ferguson and Drew Carey?
Great actors and man can those guys dance.

Oh and one other thing
Having fun really is the best revenge.
And lately? I’ve been having some pretty good fun.

“…sunshine go away today…”

sorry was just thinking about a song I heard awhile back

Ah life, your tongue doth say sweet words to my weary soul no matter how bitter the words do blow
My friends have kept me warm.

And yes, a friend really is someone who likes you and you like them back

(a kind heads up doesn’t hurt either)

…Take It Easy. Hugs. Story soon…

What did we learn tonight?

Comments Off. Email works though.

Hugs and kisses,

Auntie Slacker

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